Watch, Monitor, Don't: December 2, 2022
Why the subtle name change? Mind your own business is why
Here, there and especially in the Pac 12, conference hoops game are already beginning. We’re roughly a month into the season, a topic I plan to tackle in the next day or two, but for now we march on with the weekend slate.
Hopefully your holiday was a good one and you feasted on bird, pie and college. basketball. With college hoops, the NFL, college football and any NHL/NBA interests you might have, there’s just so much. So much to watch, keep track of, gamble on (if that’s your thing), tweet about while you can. You’re but one person, with a phone and a tv and a laptop, maybe an iPad, perhaps another tv or two… my point is, you have a finite number of screens to devote to Division I hoops the next couple of days. Let me help you with your weekend viewing plans.
As always, the weekend starts at 7 p.m. ET on Friday; apologies to the vaunted Brown-Bryant matchup, which I assure you just barely missed the cut.
Must Watch (Times ET)
No. 16 Illinois at No. 20 Maryland, 9 pm, Friday (BTN)
The discerning observer has noticed Illinois keeps popping up as a must-watch game; that’s because, in addition to playing a pretty good brand of ball and doing so at a high level so far, Brad Underwood scheduled a few tentpole games—UCLA and Virginia in Vegas, with Texas looming next week—which helped mask a sub-300 ranked schedule according to KenPom. Know who else KenPom considers having had a pretty rat schedule so far? Maryland, entering December with two wins (Miami, Saint Louis) against teams in the KenPom top-50; their third-best victory by KenPom is Louisville (and more on them in a second). Someone is gonna get revealed as a paper tiger in this game. Lean on Illinois and its top-10 defense until proven otherwise, but know that a quality Maryland offense could make this a pretty enticing styles-make-fights sort of matchup.
(Why not the rematch from last year’s national title game? Because the people in charge of such matters decided to put it on Peacock, a streamer with 15 million paid subscribers, 10 million of whom just use it to watch repeats of The Office. Get your shit together, people who televise basketball games!)
Honorable mentions: Baylor-Gonzaga (8 p.m., Friday, Peacock); Michigan-Kentucky (1 p.m., Sunday, ABC, in London); Northwestern-Michigan State (7 p.m., Sunday, BTN)
Must Monitor (Times ET)
St. John’s at No. 23 Iowa State, 3 p.m., Sunday (ESPN2)
The Johnnies are 8-0 for the first time since 2018-19, when they started 12-0 before staggering to a 21-13 finish and opening-round ousting in the NCAA Tournament. Mike Anderson teams always push, and St. John’s is no exception with the second-highest adjusted tempo according to KenPom. Iowa State does not run; they do not push tempo; they will not get in a foot race. Or they will probably lose. Johnnies senior Joel Soriano (15.3 ppg, 12.4 rpg, 62.8 percent FG%) is the sort of burly big at 6-11, 260 who can give 6-10, 218-pound Cyclone stringbean Osun Osunniyi fits inside. Iowa State’s best chance to wear out a man that size would be… to play right into Anderson’s hands and push pace? Color me intrigued at this chess match.
College basketball is more fun when St. John’s is good, when New York is represented in the college basketball world beyond postseason highlights at Madison Square Garden. The hoops history—Chris Mullin, Ron Artest, Lou Carnesecca, the McGuires, Walter Berry—is substantial and the sport a little more fun when Queens has a team worth getting behind.
Honorable Mention: Ole Miss-Memphis (7:30 p.m., Saturday, ESPN2); Saint Mary’s-Houston (9:30 p.m., Saturday, ESPN2); North Carolina-Virginia Tech (3 p.m., Sunday, ACC Network)
Must Avoid (Times ET)
Miami at Louisville, 1 p.m., Sunday (ACC Network)
Man.
Louisville.
Listen.
I feel for you. Even as someone who grew up indoctrinated in the Cult of UK (I’m in remission, thanks for your prayers), I’ve always felt like Cards fans were a passionate lot who knew their hoops and appreciated good basketball above all (except Kentucky). I have had occasion to visit the KFC Yum! Center; it is a good basketball environment! I watched Zion there and it was a halcyon basketball viewing event! At halftime, someone did the full court putt to try to win a bottle of Pappy. You all deserve better than this!
Because this ain’t changing anytime soon. Florida State, Cal and every other high-major cellar dweller might have their problems, but their problems are not your problems, Louisville. Florida State has Leonard Hamilton, and Leonard Hamilton will go fight God armed with maracas and a quart of old milk before he allows this to happen to him again. Cal is West Coast Vanderbilt minus the baseball success and the SEC money; basketball season is something to keep Oski off the streets between swim meets.
Louisville? This is all you care about. You don’t care about football unless you have a Heisman winner to underappreciate or you are Actually Papa John, and you don’t care about baseball unless you’re going to the College World Series, and you only care about either of those things until basketball season starts, and again once it ends. This is not a knock; this is life, and it must be lived, and the living is gonna be hard for a long time because if DJ Wagner didn’t want to come play for you even though you put his grandaddy on staff so why would anyone else care to?
Between Payne (former first-round pick who spent four years in the NBA), assistant coach Danny Manning (long NBA career after a decorated collegiate career at Kansas that led to him going No. 1 overall), assistant coach Nolan Smith (an All-American at Duke before becoming a first-round pick), video coordinator Reece Gaines (an All-American at Louisville before becoming a first-round pick) and analytics guru Gabe Snider (stretching a bit but he was a career 38 percent from three in 80 games at UIC), there’s a pretty good chance the coaches could beat the players at Louisville right now. There’s a very good chance it would be a better watch than whatever Miami is about to do to them on Sunday.
Honorable Mention: Florida State-Virginia (2 p.m., Saturday, ESPN2); Central Connecticut-Holy Cross (6 p.m., Saturday, ESPN+); Arizona-Cal (5 p.m., Sunday, Pac 12 Network)
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